Back To Holland – The Invasion Continues

Back To Holland

Most smugglers travel from Holland to other destinations with their illegal cargo. However, when I flew back into Holland on Sunday night I was smuggling supplies into the country instead. The flight itself was already a bit worrying when the plane hit heavy turbulence as it came into land but then I had to agonize about what would happen if customs stopped me as I collected my luggage. If they searched my suitcase they would have discovered that I was smuggling the finest British herbs into their country. Something so addictive it has millions of British people hooked. I was smuggling English Tea Bags, strictly for personal use of course. I was also carrying curry paste and catnip (for the cat not me).

There are some things that you simply can not find in Holland. So when ever I am back in England I stock up on supplies, cram them all into my suit case and wonder how confused the baggage handlers will get when they x-ray my luggage. However, I doubt it is as strange as the time my electric shaver somehow turned on in my suitcase during the flight.

My last few days in England were busy but fun. I went out to see my college friends who still joke about all the accident prone things I got up to as a student (I’ll tell some of those stories here some day). I also caught up with my old flat mate and even helped one of my friends and his girlfriend move into their first home.

Now that I am back in Holland I’ve lost most of my ability to eavesdrop on other peoples conversations. I also have to get used to being back at work again. I’ve already sorted through the thousand e-mails that were sent while I was away and deleted the nine hundred and ninety nine that were not for me.

I usually return to England for a little while every few months. My next trip is planned for Christmas. Hopefully the tea bags I secretly smuggled into the country will last that long. If they doesn’t I might be reduced to using the catnip.

Stuart

Stuart is an accident prone Englishman who has been living in the Netherlands since 2001. Even his move to the country was an unintentional accident, the result of replying to a cryptic job advertisement he found one day in a local British magazine. Since then he has learned to love the Dutch (so much so that he married one of them) and now calls the country home. He started the blog Invading Holland in 2006 as a place to share his strange stories of language misunderstandings, cultural confusions and his own accident prone nature.

18 Responses

  1. vallyP says:

    Oh yes, stu, I’m also a bootlegger. I smuggle in that other well known addictive substance that has me curled up with the DT’s once I’ve finished it – real Chedder Cheese! And I don’t mean that stuff you get in vacuum packed plastic, which just tastes like a coloured version of the wrapping. I mean the real Mccoy with the rind on! Luckily, I’m not a tea drinker, so don’t miss out there, but I’m told Dutch tea just isn’t the same.

  2. vallyP says:

    Your feat (yes, correct spelling!) is greater than mine, Stu. How on earth did you manage to miss Queen’s day for three years???

  3. Invader_Stu says:

    vallyP – I was always in england on that day smuggling more supplies :p

  4. an englishman in osaka says:

    Ah that reminds me, I must get some tea bags sent over. For the cat, not me.

  5. BlondebutBright says:

    You’re right about the English tea bags – I know many a Brit that does the same.

    I’m still hooked on many self-care products from the US, even after all these years: deodorant, face lotion, shampoo, you name it.

  6. Alan says:

    It used to be Heinz Baked Beans for me. These foreigners just don’t know how to bake a decent bean.

  7. roxanne says:

    I used to smuggle fresh fruit across the California border. I’m SOOO bad.

  8. Invader_Stu says:

    An englishman in osaka – I’ll sell you some. 50 euros per tea bag.

    BlondebutBright – My dad takes it to the extreme. When ever he visits he always has tea bags in his jacket pocket so when we eat in a Dutch restaurant he can use his own tea bag instead of theirs.

    Alan – I didn’t start liking baked beans until after I moved to Holland. Shamefully, I have not tried Heinz Baked Beans yet.

    Roxanne – I’m calling the FBI and telling :p

  9. Matt says:

    Curry paste?! villain! You wanna be makin your own my friend! Better still just cook from scratch ;) I posted ‘Matt’s Magnificant Curry Recipe’ a while ago, will dig out the link. May need to alter the kick though, it’s quite spikey ;)

  10. vallyP says:

    Have just been regaling my latest crop of first year students about your blog…you might get some new visitors…they ddidn’t seem to know what a blog was..can you believe that? 19 year olds too! Makes you wonder where they’ve been hiding ;-)

  11. Piggy says:

    Hi,
    I am moving to the Netherlands in January,,,,can you give me some more hints to what I need to pack….THanks

  12. Invader_Stu says:

    Matt – I bow my head in shame. I have dishonoured myself and my kitchen.

    vallyP – Next they will say they don’t know what the internet is :p Thanks for telling them about my blog. I feel honoured :)

    Piggy – Sure. I’ll put together a post about it and put it up during the week. Where are you moving from?

  13. Piggy says:

    I am moving somewhere around Rotterdam. My husband’s job is the cause of the transfer. I worry about what to bring to make my childrens life a little easier. I wonder about the best place to buy all of the small appliances that I will have to purchase in order to cook.

  14. Invader_Stu says:

    No problem. I’ll put together a post about moving to Holland and the kind of things you might need to know :)

  15. sociolingo says:

    Yep, I’m a smuggler too! We brought 1 kg of Marmite back with us to Mali. Plus assorted T bags – especially Earl Grey.

    There’s always a frisson of excitement (or panic or something) coming through customs!

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